The Success Paradox

I find it crazy that even though a lot of us strive for success.

 

We lowkey don’t actually like successful people.

 

For a lot of people:

 

I know when I was younger, as much as I wanted to be successful I would question why rich people would ‘waste’ money on a fancy car, or luxury vacation or designer clothes.

 

Maybe you too have questioned ‘If you have all this money, why waste it on a first class flight?’

 

Or maybe you’ve put together a vision board, imaging all the milestones and achievements you'll hit one day.

 

Yet you despise opening up LinkedIn or Instagram, because your envy convinces you you’re behind.

 

I call this the Success Paradox.

his is why it’s a paradox.

 

If we want it so much, why do we judge those who have it?

 

I started reading a book all about self sabotage (I mentioned it last week, but I’m mentioning it again - it’s that good: The Mountain Is You by Brianna Weist), and she talks about how even though we set goals and wish for things, we ultimately don’t want what makes us happy, we want what’s familiar.

 

This is the core of self sabotage.

You say you want to meet new people.

But it’s familiar and safe to cancel plans + stay home.

You say you want a better job.

 

But it’s familiar and safe to keep complaining about the job you know.

 

So when it comes to success, wanting isn’t enough, it has to become famiilar.

It’s going to be very hard to invite success into your life, if you don’t even like success of other people.

 

Because if you think about it…

 

Success is like a virus

 

It duplicates itself.

 

It replicates and reproduces.

 

Think about a time when you were inspired by success, it inspired you to create, and as you created and improved you become successful.

 

(This is why people say the people you surround yourself with shape your future)

 

 

 

But this is only if you have a healthy detachment between success and your self worth.

 

Let me explain.

 

If seeing success in others makes you feel low, maybe that’s a signal you’ve put all your ‘self worth’ eggs into the success basket. 

 

None in the hobby basket.

None in the friendships basket.

None in the health and fitness basket.

 

You're all-or-nothing on success.

 

Which is why you feel so low, when you're reminded that you ‘don’t have it'.

 

The Success Paradox is just a reminder that you were never looking for the ‘success’, you just wanted the feeling you thought comes with it.

 

We simply wanted permission:

 

 

And the truth is…. you never needed the success.

 

You just needed to give yourself permission.

 

What are you asking permission for?